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After two nights at Desire Riviera, we were off to the second location: Desire Pearl, about 20 minutes away by taxi, on another part of the coast.

This hotel is smaller and much more romantic, geared towards nudist couples who just want to be naked with themselves, rather than sex partying and swingers though that is a component.

We were assigned the penthouse I know, so bougie. We loved it. We had a terrace that overlooked the ocean, a marble bathtub that was basically invented for Instagram, and our own personal hot pool.

Not exactly the most humble of experiences, but certainly blessed. A little up there, but this is an all-inclusive resort; all the food, drinks, and fun are free.

We began our stay with a couples massage from two sexy masseurs. But I was entirely wrong; No happy endings were had though Scarlett later told me she was having the exact same thoughts.

The spa—and the hotel in general—is not that kind of place. Our second-to-last night, we knew we had to rage out. We decided to just play into the twin theme that had followed us everywhere.

At the disco, we met an incredibly interesting Dutch couple who had been together for nearly 25 years.

We drunkenly ordered pizza to our room and invited them upstairs. We chilled in the hot tub naked and talked all night long about life, swinging, and non-monogamy.

It was the bonding experience I never even knew we needed. Scarlett seems a refreshed version of herself, more comfortable in her own skin. I feel like a whole new woman with a whole new lease on life.

We had the time of our lives and rehash the adventure almost everyday. We will be regaling our family with stories of penises, stripper poles, and the orgies seen for many years to come.

United States. Type keyword s to search. Today's Top Stories. Taraji P. Henson Headlines the Power On Summit. The State of Gabrielle Union.

Courtesy of author. Just me enjoying a soak in our private jacuzzi at Desire Riviera Maya. You may be able to find the same content in another format, or you may be able to find more information, at their web site.

Bathtime in our penthouse suite at Desire Pearl. Scarlett, right, and I enjoying our oceanside dinner for two. Pure joy!

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Trump talks weekend rallies as uncertainty grows about debates. Stimulus talks stall, leaving millions of American in limbo.

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You do, however, have to wear clothes when dining at the restaurants. After dinner, we went back to our hotel room, drunk as lushes on spring break, and promptly passed out at 10pm.

But we realized why everyone wanted to know—it was because we were a fantasy. Such is life. The second night we decided to have a three course meal by the sea—one of the many romantic and sensual add-ons available at Desire.

One option was make-your-own-porno, wherein a real videographer would come and film you having sex with your partner.

After our romantic dining experience, we made our way to the show on the main piazza. Desire puts on a show every evening and female guests seem to get very into the theme, dressing in sexy costumes and mesh clothing.

The true spectacle was not the highly talented pole dancer, however, nor the feather bikini clad strippers, but Lisa, a very drunk, very exuberant hotel guest.

Lisa volunteered for everything. She climbed into a prop bathtub and had champagne drank out of her snatch. But more impressive even than Lisa, was a couple in their mid-seventies.

Both card carrying members of the AARP, the woman had her breasts completely out of a top that ended just beneath them.

Her seemingly demure husband wore a fanny-pack, cargo shorts, and a Hawaiian shirt. They go to Desire and resorts like it on the regular. They regaled me with a story of a gang bang on a prior visit, during which Sheila serviced several men while Bernie watched.

I learned nothing on this trip if not that penises are as unique as snowflakes. Extremely hungover, Scarlett and I spent the next day swimming and sunbathing.

Being in the pool at Desire was like being the human manifestation of Saturn, surrounded by a ring of dongs. It was a buffet of naked men, all with vastly varying penis sizes.

The crown jewel of the pool scene was a rather rotund man in his sixties with a truly astonishing Prince Albert a penis piercing, for the uninitiated.

After two nights at Desire Riviera, we were off to the second location: Desire Pearl, about 20 minutes away by taxi, on another part of the coast.

This hotel is smaller and much more romantic, geared towards nudist couples who just want to be naked with themselves, rather than sex partying and swingers though that is a component.

We were assigned the penthouse I know, so bougie. We loved it. We had a terrace that overlooked the ocean, a marble bathtub that was basically invented for Instagram, and our own personal hot pool.

Not exactly the most humble of experiences, but certainly blessed. A little up there, but this is an all-inclusive resort; all the food, drinks, and fun are free.

We began our stay with a couples massage from two sexy masseurs. But I was entirely wrong; No happy endings were had though Scarlett later told me she was having the exact same thoughts.

The spa—and the hotel in general—is not that kind of place. Our second-to-last night, we knew we had to rage out.

We decided to just play into the twin theme that had followed us everywhere. At the disco, we met an incredibly interesting Dutch couple who had been together for nearly 25 years.

We drunkenly ordered pizza to our room and invited them upstairs. We chilled in the hot tub naked and talked all night long about life, swinging, and non-monogamy.

It was the bonding experience I never even knew we needed. Scarlett seems a refreshed version of herself, more comfortable in her own skin.

I feel like a whole new woman with a whole new lease on life. We had the time of our lives and rehash the adventure almost everyday.

We will be regaling our family with stories of penises, stripper poles, and the orgies seen for many years to come. United States.

Type keyword s to search. Today's Top Stories. Taraji P. Henson Headlines the Power On Summit. The State of Gabrielle Union.

Rate this movie Oof, that was Rotten. What did you think of the movie? Step 2 of 2 How did you buy your ticket? Let's get your review verified.

Fandango AMCTheatres. More Info. Submit By opting to have your ticket verified for this movie, you are allowing us to check the email address associated with your Rotten Tomatoes account against an email address associated with a Fandango ticket purchase for the same movie.

How did you buy your ticket? View All Photos Movie Info. Over one night, four couples and a group of friends trying a threesome navigate the complexities of modern sex.

Meanwhile, a couple negotiate their new open relationship. Martin Gero. Steven Hoban , Tracey Boulton. Oct 14, Copper Heart Entertainment.

Aaron Abrams Matt. Carly Pope Kris. Kristin Booth Abby. Josh Dean Andrew. Sonja Bennett Mia. Josh Cooke Eric. Diora Baird Jamie. Callum Blue Ken.

Ennis Esmer Gord. Peter Oldring Dave. Martin Gero Director. Aaron Abrams Writer. Martin Gero Writer. Steven Hoban Producer. Tracey Boulton Producer.

Aaron Abrams Executive Producer. Martin Gero Executive Producer. Michael Baker Executive Producer. Jeff Sackman Executive Producer. Lorne Abrams Executive Producer.

September 12, Rating: 1. September 2, Full Review…. February 1, Full Review…. November 30, Full Review…. February 23, Full Review….

October 18, Full Review…. October 18, Rating: 2. September 11, Full Review…. View All Critic Reviews Sep 17, Pas drole du tout. Devrait plutot etre classe documentaire.

En fait on suit plusieurs couples dans differents type de relations, rt ce, pendant les differents stades d'une relation sexuelle. Nov 19, First, they are not young!!

But that doesn't really matter, cuz it was well acted. Don't let the vulgar title fool you, this is quite a funny blue comedy. With hilarity ensured.

Sex is not all that important, it's more about the relationship that people developed. Not a bad movie for Valentine's day.

Sylvester K Super Reviewer. Mar 31, As a comedy, it's more serious than anything else. Way too serious, hoping to get laughs out of jokes that arent funny, and a bunch of bad acting during too many sex scenes.

Bryce I Super Reviewer. Sep 29, See, there is some truth in advertising. Actually, the movie is more concerned with relationships and, like I said in last week's review of "Humpday," how sex changes everything.

All of which is performed well and with sincerity by a likable cast who hit all the right awkward notes. Oh, I almost forgot. There is sex, some graphic, some funny and some downright kinky.

To be perfectly fair, Ken Callum Blue is 31, having already fucked his way through most of his office with a one night stand with Jamie Diora Baird being next.

Kris just thinks it is about time, feeling Matt has a lot of pressure he needs released. It is not the first time together for Mia Sonja Bennett and Eric Josh Cooke but it is the first time after they broke up when she invites him in for a nightcap.

It has been three weeks for Abby Kristin Booth and Andrew Josh Dean since they have had sex and if nothing changes, it could be quite a bit longer before the next time.

Gord Ennis Esmer and Inez Natalie Lisinska are about to move into a place together but not before he wants her to have sex with Dave Peter Oldring , his hated and well-hung roommate.

Now, this last encounter is the one I have trouble with. While the homoerotic angle is handled tastefully, I found Gord wanting to watch his girlfriend having sex with someone he despises more than a little disturbing.

And that's not to mention his eating a sandwich while being a spectator. Walter M Super Reviewer. See all Audience reviews. Jamie: I'm twenty-three. Ken: Bloody hell.

I mean, I'm thirty-one-years-old. You know what that means? It means I can't be running around fucking all these girls. I mean, half the time I don't even speak to them ever again.

That's rude is what it is. It's immature. It's embarrassing, it's fucking embarrassing. There comes a point when you want all of this to be about more than just getting off.

Do you know what I mean? So I'm gonna go. I'm gonna go, and, uh, I'm gonna ask you if I can call you later in the week. I'll tell you what I'm gonna do for you.

Amateur pornography began to rapidly increase in the s, with the camcorder revolution, when people began recording their sex lives and Beauty nude the results on VCRs. Trump talks weekend rallies as uncertainty Hardest orgasm about debates. See all Audience reviews. View Sexy christmas boobs Quotes. Don't have an account? You can Sluttyamelia chaturbate as Free porn viddeo food as you want. Aaron Abrams Executive Producer.

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